Valentine
by littlelinguistme
Summary: "I made you dinner for Valentine's Day?" Oh god, why did it come out as a question. Get yourself together Kudo! EDIT: Now with a White Day story! (sorta) Ch. 2 is an attempt at 1k in 1hr that happens in the same universe so I've decided to add it to this fic.
1. Suspicion for Dinner

**Surprise** by littlelinguistme  
Written for the CoAi discord server's Valentine's Day challenge. *Looks at calendar* Only four days late… not bad haha

 **Disclaimer:** Can I not claim ownership to this plot? Like, yeah the characters are definitely not mine but like if you squint, maybe you can see this is trying to be fluff but it's _awful_.

* * *

She was suspicious. Everything she had braced herself to see was distinctly missing from the sight in front of her. Shiho cautiously inspected the scene.

 _No scorch marks, no stray powder…_ the chemist looked almost comical with her head turning back and forth, searching for but not finding what logically should have been present. _Where's the blood? Severed phalanges?_ She shifted her sights to the teenage detective before her. Other than looking a little worse for wear, her meticulous gaze could not note anything wrong with Kudo. Finding literally nothing out of place, she turned back to the plate before her.

For all intents and purposes, it looked perfectly fine, edible even. She peered at Shinichi hovering nearby and tried to conjure a universe where he could put out food-fit-for-consumption. She failed.

"Mouri-san made it." She was certain. There were exactly zero ways he could have had a hand in cooking _anything._ Usually, the kitchens wouldn't last long enough to produce food items, not under his care, hell, the detective once half burned Hakase's house down trying to make _coffee_. Before her was a perfectly fetching plate of arugula and beet salad, garlic bread, and most alarming, chicken parmesan over fettuccine alfredo.

He started, "what? No, of course not. Why would she cook you a Valentine's day meal? Unless you're doubting her loyalty to sensei in which case I assure you that despite your formidable charms, she remains steadfastly true." He was rambling; one of his tells, she knew. Her eyes narrowed.

"What did you do," she demanded an answer.

Shiho was shocked when he started pacing in agitation, clearly fretting. He ran a hand through his hair, muttering all the while, sort of at her and sort of at himself simultaneously. "...knew this wouldn't be enough...good thing I got that bag as backup… just wanted to do something ... more personal and special..." The biochemist couldn't follow his unreasonable line of logic. _What are you…_

"Kudo-kun." A flawless eyebrow raised, questioning him. She always brought him back. "Explain."

"I made you dinner for Valentine's Day?" _Oh god, why did it come out as a question. Get yourself together Kudo,_ Shinichi berated himself.

"Lies." She spied the expensive bottle of Chardonnay decanting nearby. She could not believe he would have known to do that on his own.

"Of course that's not the only thing I did! I definitely also got you the most expensive not-yet-available-to-the-public limited edition clutch, handbag, and purse that money could buy. Dinner was just the first surprise in a long loong line of things I got you. Of course."

Shiho was stunned speechless. _What the- what is this man…_ Her thoughts were interrupted by his shy question, "...is that okay? I mean no amount of gifts could ever amount to the depth of my feelings for you and like my pockets aren't lined with gold but they're pretty deep and I tried my best-"

"Shinichi." This use of his given name gave him pause, enough for her to clarify her confusion. "I mean the food. You can't cook."

He didn't understand. "Well, obviously, I learned."

"Impossible."

"Wh-what?" He spluttered. "I- I know I'm bad but… I can learn if I put my head to it, you know." She didn't look convinced so he continued, "I'm not saying it was easy or anything..."

She sat and blinked at him, knowing he'd continue until she granted him repose. Shiho leaned against the counter and waited, tapping her fingers idly.

"... and this is the only thing I can make… even after three months of classes…." He was red and he wouldn't look at her.

The detective hadn't originally planned on disclosing just how much effort he had put into this Valentine's day but everything was going so wrong. He only wanted to make his gift a little more meaningful. How much emotion could really be conveyed when all he had to do was click a little online shopping cart and type in a credit card number? And besides he wanted to give her a break from cooking every once in a while. Can't she just go along with his plans this once and not give him such a hard time?

She could see that she had hurt him. It hasn't occurred to her that he had spent so much time in this. _When? How had she not noticed?_ Rather than satisfying her curiosity for risk of hurting his feelings further, she opted to sit down at the counter where he had laid out their meal.

"The food looks good," she offered, trying to make up for her insensitive comments earlier. It worked. He perked up immediately; his eyes were bright and sincere as he took his place next to her, taking his cue when she tapped the seat in encouragement.

"I've been planning this since November," he explained. Shinichi reached for the wine and poured them both a glass as she reached for a fork, mentally readying herself for the food that years of acquaintance with him wouldn't allow her to fully trust.

"Ever since you cooked for that American holiday with the turkey. Thanksgiving, I believe it's called. In honor of the first feast between native Americans and the European sett-"

Her first forkful had reached her mouth and he stopped, too anxious for her to like his food to continue.

She tried to conceal a quick sniff of the food and shoved it in. Eyes closed and chewing quickly, she waited for death.

Nothing happened. She swallowed.

Shiho opened her eyes in actual shock and gathered another forkful of salad. Musing to herself, she supposed it was difficult to make salad deadly. Looking up, the scientist found her companion sporting the biggest grin.

"It's good right!? I know you love beets so I looked specifically for a recipe that had them. I didn't know all you had to do was boil them! And I learned all about the different leaves you could put in a salad before picking this…."

His worded faded out as she became overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness. It didn't matter that the beets were slightly undercook and that there was too much dressing. It was good enough.

"It's good." He smiled and began eating his salad. Shiho sipped on the wine and was pleased that it paired well. He had done really well this year. Emboldened by the wine she decided go for the pasta. This, too was slightly undercooked and over seasoned but she found she did not mind.

They chatted comfortably comfortably, bodies turned towards each other. Shinichi had stretched a leg over to her side and rested his calf against her.

His mother had been giving him lessons. Apparently, she had gotten really excited at the idea of keeping the sessions secret so she'd been dressing up as all of their mutual acquaintances and fake clients to throw her off. Of course. She could definitely see his overindulgent impatient mother's touch in the dishes. He refilled her glass.

"I didn't know Yukiko-san could cook," she said, trying to remember a single meal with the Kudos that wasn't eaten out or lavishly catered.

"Well, compared to me, everyone can cook right?" He laughed as he cut some chicken and brought it to his mouth. Shiho swatted it down before he could eat it. The chicken-speared fork clattered as it hit his plate, bounced off the counter and into his lap. Eyes wild, he looked up at her in alarm.

"That chicken is raw, you _idiot._ " Shinichi inspected the meat in confusion. It looked perfectly cooked to him.

"What do you mean? This is a perfect medium rare. Do you know how hard it was for me to get this just right?" Crazy woman stained his shirt and pants too… The detective looked up, annoyed, when she didn't answer only to find her openly gaping at him, looking at him as if he were dumber than soup.

"Hello? Shiho?"

Instead of answering, she moved to her chicken, which until then, had been untouched. She cut it right in half and was horrified to discover it was just as he said. Seared on the outside and _red_ on the inside. Her head whipped around to glare at him, as if to say _how dare you try to feed this to me._

Understanding he'd done something wrong, Shinichi started defending himself. "I saw this recipe a few months ago for chicken sushi and I thought it was cool and everything in sushi can be safely eaten raw so I thought even if I messed up it'd at least be edible?" He brought his leg back over to his side and sat up.

"Did you read the entire recipe?"

"Huh? No. I decided against sushi because I didn't think I'd be able to get the rice right. And homemade sushi isn't romantic, you kno-?"

She interrupted him. "It was definitely chicken tempura, you dunce, because chicken cannot be consumed raw. Have you _ever_ eaten raw chicken? At any restaurant? When you get fried chicken, has anyone ever asked you how you'd like it cooked?" She huffed in exasperation and pushed the plates away from them.

"I've been practicing this for months! I've been perfectly f-" Oh.

He thought of the horrible stomachaches he'd been suffering from as of late. At first he thought it due to the heavy cream in the alfredo sauce; unlike him, Shiho was able to consume dairy products because of her half-british heritage. He'd tried taking lactase, an enzyme supplement, to help with his lactose intolerance but when the stomachaches persisted, he assumed the pills didn't work with him. _Could it really have been due to the meat?_

She pushed her chair back and stood, interrupting his thoughts. "I'm sorry. I should have known better than to try cooking. I know I'm awful." He was crushed. He'd ruined Valentine's Day. He watched as she wordlessly brought their dishes to the garbage and dumped the contents. Shinichi grew more and more crestfallen with each movement.

Shiho made her way to the fridge after dropping the dishes in the sink. She grabbed some heavy cream, arugula, beets, butter, and chicken. From the pantry she got shallots, garlic, and bread. She looked to him sitting there where she'd left him at the counter.

"What are you waiting for?"

"Wha-"

"I'll teach you how to do it right. What are we missing?" He looked at her with all the gratefulness of a knight after receiving his lord's mercy.

"Things to make the dressing… We need vin-"

"Wash your hands first." She directed. "We'll start with the salad." As he got ready, the scientist wondered aloud, "How did your mother not tell you the chicken wasn't cooked right?"

He looked over at her, "ah, her food always looks alright but the taste was so-so. I thought she could at least teach me how to not burn things or turn them to mush. That's my biggest problem right?"

Shiho didn't even know where to begin. _So Yukiko-san can't cook either. She's good at manipulating images though,_ the girl connected the actress' disguise ability to a capacity to cover up inedible food. _Well, at least she got him to an okay level. I can work with this…_ A loud clatter brought her attention back to him.

Shinichi laughed sheepishly as he picked up the knife off the ground. He turned around tried to start cutting the shallots but she shouted for him to, "wash it first!" Shiho sighed. This was gonna be a long day. She finished her wine and went over to help him.

* * *

 **A/N:** So here are some omakes bc I was too lazy to write them out and also bc I'm sorry this is unedited OTL. Lesson learned: I can't write fluff for my _life._ Why was this so difficult? /Omakes, I've decided, will be 10-word drabbles because why not :3

 **OMAKE 1:** On what Shiho got Shinichi for Valentine's Day:  
"OH MY GOD THIS IS A SIGNED FIRST EDITION HOLMES"

 **OMAKE 2:** On how the lessons went:  
"What part of 'lightly season it' did you not understand?"

 **OMAKE 3:** On Yusaku's cooking skills:  
Shinichi shuddered. "Don't ask. We're rich; we just get takeout."


	2. Love in the Frozen Aisle

**Prompts: White Day + Walking in on an Embarrassing Situation  
WARNING: this is unedited trash I wrote probably drunk some months ago for a 1k in 1hr discord challenge**

Hey folks! Do you wanna hear a cute story? I've got a _good_ one. It's about how Shinichi Kudo is cursed. _Cursed._ And I'm not talking about the inexplicable trail of corpses that seem hellbent on keeping him employed. We all know about that one already; there's twenty four years worth of manga and almost nine hundred episodes of anime to tell that story.

No, I mean his love life is _d_. He can't have any nice nice events without interference. He's doomed to forever be third wheeled by his own mother. It started when he first met the nice girl.

Shinichi Kudo and his mother were out grocery shopping. It was as mundane of an activity as could be. Usually, they would just go out for meals but Yukiko Kudo was to guest star on Japan's most watched cooking competition show with Yoko Okino. She was feeling particularly nervous and thus, they were out shopping for supplies so she could practice. Yukiko Kudo, multi-talented actress extraordinaire, had pretenses to keep up.

They were in the least sexy department, the frozen vegetable section, discussing Shinichi's absolute lack of a sex life, when they spotted _her._ Well, it is more accurate to say that she spotted _her._

"... Shin-chan, Shin-chaaaaaaan" his mother whined. It drew not a small number of looks and she reveled in the attention. It was even better that her super cute son was beet red. "How am I ever supposed to enjoy grandchildren if you've never even slept with a girl?! Honestly, this is why Ran-san left you, you know. You take _foreeeeever_ to make a move and she couldn't wait anymore!"

He didn't comment, used to her outlandish public outbursts but he still hadn't quite mastered controlling his blush.

"What is it? Are you shy? Are you gay? You can tell mama. I love you no matter what you are, you know?"

"I'm not gay mom, can you please just drop it?"

"Oh, oh my. Is it...? Is it that? We can get you a doctor Shin-chan. A psychologist? Sometimes stress can cause problems, you know, down there. Not that I've ever personally encountered that problem, haha. Your father is quite the-" She dropped the package of mixed corn, carrots and peas that she was holding.

"SHIN-CHAN, SHIN-CHAN!" The beautiful woman started making an even bigger fuss, voice unabashedly raised, and hands waving about. She started hitting her son to get him to look where she was gesturing wilding to.

"Oh my god, _look_! Isn't she just so _beautiful?_ Not as beautiful as me, obviously, but she is _such_ a _looker!_ Shin-chan, you've gotta go talk to her. Hey, Miss! Excuse me, Miss!" Shinichi's blush grew and covered his entire face and neck now.

He protested as his mother bodily dragged him over to this perfect strawberry-haired stranger. The girl's hand paused as she took notice of the loud mother-and-son combo barreling clumsily towards her. She noticeably took stock of the situation and Shinichi saw her glance to the side, looking for an escape route. Poor girl did not sign up for this when she walked over to the cooler. He would have to apologize.

Yukiko stopped just short of an arms length away from the girl, half-british and half-japanese, Shinichi observed. She then shoved her son directly into said stranger's personal space bubble where he tripped and put his hand on the cooler door to steady himself.

That action resulted in a scream. From the pretty girl his mother was trying to set him up with. What?

"OW OW OW, THAT'S MY ARM, IF YOU WOULD KINDLY JUST" Oh. He had shut the cooler door on her forearm. OH! HE HAD SHUT THE DOOR ON HER ARM. Shinichi jumped away and she quickly freed herself, rubbing at what would surely be a nasty bruise.

"I-I'm SO sorry! I didn't mean to! I fell off balan-" He trailed off as he looked into her seagreen eyes. Mom was right. Gorgeous. He sucked in a deep breath, steeling himself. _Mom's already got me 90% there. I might as well..._

"Hi, I'm Shinichi. C-Can I take you out to dinner? As an apology for hurting you just now? It can be as expensive as you want. I'll cover the medical costs too…" The mention of expensive food put a dangerous glint in her eyes. Shinichi gulped.

So to be fair, he probably wouldn't have even noticed her without his mother being there. Isn't that sad? We'll just focus on what a _blessing_ she is. Shiho, that was the girl's name, insisted to be taken to the ritziest restaurant in all of Tokyo and the bill was well over a thousand dollars, though that was mostly due to the fact that his mother and father was spying on them from two tables down and added their wildly expensive tab to theirs.

On Valentines' day, he tried cooking for her and ended up almost poisoning them both - his mother's mistake. On White day he tried to just buy her cute flowers, his mother's advice. Turns out, she's allergic to pollen. On her part, she took his clumsy love in stride. She thinks he's cute. Sometimes she'll slip his mother false information just to see him get flustered.

Words: 892


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